Ocram’s Blog

I managed to take the wrong day off work

I would have sworn that for the next two weeks I had Saturday and Monday off. But I checked the rota just after midnight on my iPod touch and I had today listed as off and that I was working yesterday. So of course, I figured that I had probably just entered it incorrectly… I do double check it, but it could happen. So I find the paper copy, and it matched up. Oh, shit…

The most annoying thing is that I don’t know where I got the idea that I had yesterday off. All I remember is on Sunday questioning the logic of having two days off and having to work a six and a half hour day between them. But, as far as I know the rota hasn’t changed for this week either, so I’m at a loss as to where I got the idea from.

The other thing is that nobody phoned me. No messages, no voicemail. If somebody doesn’t turn up for work, wouldn’t you question why? Call to see whether I’ve overslept (I was up before 9 today), or whatever. And it’s not like it would have gone un-noticed. I work in a department with 3 other people directly and I would have had to have been in to cover the last 90 minutes, managers notice when I’m 5-10 minutes late, so they must be checking when I start.

As something like this has never happened to me before, I have no idea what’s going to happen about it. I’m going to call in tomorrow morning to well, apologise first and foremost, and I guess at least find out whether I should come in today to make up for it, whether there will be an investigation, whether I’m suspended, whether I’m fired, whether it’ll be counted as an unpaid day (which would be pretty sweet), or anything else.

I think it’s pretty much guaranteed there will be an investigation, but I don’t know what the normal proceedure for such an incident is.

OK, I’ve checked the staff handbook, which says “Payment is not made for unauthorised absence, and, when appropriate, disciplinary action is always taken.” On the plus side, under the disciplinary section it also says “You will not be dismissed for a first breach of discipline, except in the case of gross misconduct.” Unauthorised absence isn’t specifically noted under gross misconduct, although some of the examples given are quite vague. So yes, I won’t be paid for it, which I completely expected. I (hopefully) won’t be dismissed for it, but I still after reading the handbook don’t know exactly what the disciplinary procedure is. If I had a decent manager, she would probably let me work the time today and just forget about it, but unfortunately I feel the odds of that happening are similar to that of winning the lottery. I think the most reasonable thing to do is just to phone in tomorrow morning, and find out what happens from there. Hopefully they will take into account that it was truely a mistake, but… who knows? On top of that I probably won’t be able to sleep all night through worrying about it, and then oversleep tomorrow morning thus not getting a chance to call before I was supposed to start yesterday (11AM).

Some days I feel like the only reason that I’m alive is because I’m too scared to do anything about it.

I hate my job, I feel like a stranger in my own home and the only woman I’ve ever loved…. well, I’m not even sure if we can be considered friends anymore

I guess I’ve got my answer of just how little I meant to her….

So why am I still losing sleep over it?

I guess in theory anyway… In practice, at least at the moment, it doesn’t feel like that

Don’t get me wrong, I still love her… but I just feel empty right now… like I’ve been taken for a fool.

To go from what I thought we had to… well, nothing, in such a short period of time… It just makes me question whether there was anything there to begin with…

Maybe it’s just my paranoia, that I’m imagining it all, and it feels horrible not to trust her but, well… that’s just how I’m feeling. I’ve felt like we’ve been drifting further and further apart for months now, but now is the first time I’ve felt like there is no turning back… That, even though it makes no sense at all, she doesn’t want to speak to me anymore, but for whatever reason doesn’t want to say directly.

I’m not going to say goodbye though… I guess because I really don’t want this to be the end…

I came to the realisation a few weeks ago that I want to spend the rest of my life with her…

Even though it will never be that, I still feel that she is somebody that I want to have as a part of my life forever… even though it is only coming up to two years and a half years, I can’t imagine her not being there.

http://jmm.aaa.net.au/articles/7729.htm

THE ORIGINAL VERSION: If you love something, Set it free… If it comes back, it’s yours, If it doesn’t, it never was yours….

THE PESSIMIST VERSION: If you love somebody, Set her free … If she ever comes back, she’s yours, If she doesn’t, well, as expected, she never was.

THE OPTIMIST VERSION: If you love somebody, Set her free … Don’t worry, she will come back.

THE SUSPICIOUS VERSION: If you love somebody, Set her free … If she ever comes back, ask her why.

THE IMPATIENT VERSION: If you love somebody, Set her free … If she doesn’t comes back within some time limit, forget her.

THE PATIENT VERSION: If you love somebody, Set her free … If she doesn’t come back, continue to wait until she comes back …

THE PLAYFUL VERSION: If you love somebody, Set her free … If she comes back, and if you love her still, set her free again, repeat

THE LAWYER’S VERSION: If you love somebody, Set her free… Clause 1a of Paragraph 13a-1 in the second amendment of the Matrimonial Freedom Act clearly states that…

THE BILL GATES VERSION: If you love somebody, Set her free… If she comes back, I think we can charge her for re-installation fees and tell her that she’s also going to get an upgrade.

THE STATISTICIAN’S VERSION:: If you love somebody, Set her free… If she loves you, the probability of her coming back is high If she doesn’t, your relationship was improbable anyway.

THE POSSESSIVE VERSION: If you love somebody don’t ever set her free.

THE MBA VERSION: If you love somebody set her free… instantaneously… and look for others simultaneously.

THE PSYCHOLOGIST’S VERSION: If you love somebody set her free… If she comes back, her super ego is dominant If she doesn’t come, back her id is supreme If she doesn’t go, she must be crazy.

THE FINANCE EXPERT VERSION: If you love somebody set her free… If she comes back, its time to look for fresh loans. If she doesn’t, write her off as an asset gone bad.

THE MARKETING VERSION: If you love somebody set her free… If she comes back, she has brand loyalty If she doesn’t, reposition the brand in new markets.

I particularly like the statistician’s version… although perhaps worded slightly differently

such insightful spam.

Ideas move fast when their time comes.
There is no education like adversity.
Crime expands according to our willingness to put up with it.
Great geniuses have the shortest biographies.
Love means to love that which is unlovable or it is no virtue at all.
I know of no country in which there is so little independence of mind and real freedom of discussion as in America.
Nothing goes out of fashion sooner than a long dress with a very low neck.
The happier the moment the shorter.
We never live, but we hope to live and as we are always arranging to be happy, it must be that we never are so.
I find that doing of the will of God leaves me no time for disputing about His plans.
Predicting the future is easy. It’s trying to figure out what’s going on now that’s hard.
The person who runs away exposes himself to that very danger more than a person who sits quietly.
Sometimes, when one person is missing, the whole world seems depopulated.